My question isn't why--the answer is as vaired as the person and we can 2nd guess til cows fly. We want to squeeze every delicious moment out of them and keep them ... We all need to know that we can have an influence on the world around us when we need to. SAGITTARIUS (November 22 - December 19) I am left behind wondering where they went. It is usually easier than saying something out of anger that you will regret later or constant yelling at each other. However, it doesn’t need to be the end of the world, especially if you employ a few coping mechanisms to help you through what could be considered a very upsetting time in your life. It’s easy to blame the one giving the silent treatment as someone who is selfish or controlling. I’ve been told by the manager it’s best for everyone if I left because I’m ruining the morale of the team. The silent treatment he gave to me was to make me feel like I didn’t matter. He’s alone and unhappy now. Then he'll call me and when im all crying and hurt, asking why he did it to me, he'll say its because I made him mad. Yet the silent treatment can also occur without warning or stonewalling as well. It's important to take ownership for your role in the silent treatment though, since placing blame usually doesn't do much to improve the state of your relationship. To prove it, if my examples above didn’t already do that for you, here are the signs ranked from most to least likely to give you the silent treatment. Break off with this Dude, get some Therapy or 12 Step Codependence/Love Recovery and try again. It is simply that persons way of dealing with someone who is angry at them. Once the treatment has had its intended effect, it comes to an end. You will finally be able to heal and understand what’s going on helped me so much xx stay strong, Your email address will not be published. My 62 yr old boyfriend of 17 months is frequently irritable with me. It causes emotional trauma or stress. Avoid letting the silent treatment get the better of you. I noticed he doesn’t even try to impress me with his appearance but when he goes out on outing and sends me pictures he has a fresh cut and is dressed nice (never on our dates). My opinion the silent treatment is totally unacceptable and childish in any situation--good communication is vital to a good intimate relationship. Although I dislike the silent treatment I'd rather someone do that than come out disrespectful towards me. This may be a given, but there is a wide variety of overwhelming emotions that come with being ignored. But unless you did something in particular to trigger a passive aggressive or avoidant behavior, then it is quite possible she is just not that into you. It applies to both genders. We own a house, but he sleeps in the other room with his dog, he won’t say a word, he goes places without me, and basically acts like i do not exist. Do your best to be patient. Guys do it too. what more can i do? My nex gave me AND my son the silent treatment over the Christmas holidays — around and including Christmas. Why? Cancer man is giving you the silent treatment? If she wasn’t that upset, then maybe you can give her the silent treatment for 3 … Until recently I got jealous that he was getting close with a another co worker . Although you might know why men give the silent treatment, it doesn’t mean it’s a pleasant experience. Don’t explain that you learned this technique from a douchebag and you are not willing to put up with her drama. ‘And it does tremendous damage.’. I don’t really know anymore. Well mine is a lil bit different. I feel sad that I’m looking up this topic online even. This is nothing strange and it’s not a cause for alarm. Nobody engages the silent treatment expecting it to damage the relationship, and that’s the danger. When I ask open questions, he shuts me down. It’s an incredibly hard pattern to break because both partners lay the blame at the feet of the other. I don’t know if it’s the right thing to do because we had a lil chat 3 days ago when he asked me to tell him about how do i really feel actually because he doesn’t understand. Afraid of their own temper. Being ignored can leave someone feeling injured – … If you are in a committed relationship then the silent treatment will do more harm than good. I think one may do it because they are trying their best to deal with their emotions. Couple of days off work sick and she’s had to work with a colleague I usually work with. The best predictor of divorce isn’t whether a couple fights – arguments are inevitable – but how a couple fights. eventually we drifted after that , and i stil have nightmares always at the end of the dream asking her why did she do so. I checked his status on facebook and he changed it to single but he told me if I change mine then we are finished. I apologized several times for making him feel this way and he said he needs time to himself and that he would talk to me when he feels like it. 3 months after complete silent treatment from her and all her family, from a country i can’t visit, I flipped out and swore at them online – because I can’t reach them The silent treatment catches guys off-guard. Answer: Yes, both men and women are capable of inflicting the silent treatment. You sound like you’re pretty young– there are a LOT more and better men in the Sea after him. He does his ignoring tactic when i catch him in a lie. I enjoy spending time with him and don’t mind. Then the next time I saw her she could be holding a door open for me, the time after that shut the door in my face. Why People Give the Silent Treatment. I’m currently looking for another job. Psychologists believe that a passive aggressive person acquires this behavioral technique though negative childhood experiences. Silence in men is usually an attempt, if a clumsy one, to solve problems in their relationship. Copyright © 2020 Interactive One, LLC. Leave and let him drown in his own silent head. This may be a given, but there is a wide variety of overwhelming emotions that come with being ignored. They feel as though telling you may make them appear weak and inadequate and that is the last thing a man wants his wife to think of him. I got mad at him , and now he has completely shut me out . Not all men give the silent treatment, just like not all women nag. I always say that knowledge is power, and the first fact you need to know about this issue is exactly why narcissists give you the silent treatment in the first place. We got divorced, I became alcoholic and got deported from UAE where we lived due to alcohol related problems. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. My ex wife used silent treatment our whole marriage whenever she wanted to hurt me. 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